WHAT KIND OF A NOISE ANNOYS AN OYSTER?

(by Billy Curtis (lyrics) and Frank Crumit (tune))

Lots of folks are worried over how they'll pay the rent
Some folks are annoyed because they can't lay up a cent
Others are perplexed about the latest picture show
But there is really only just one thing I'd like to know

	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster?
	No matter what I do, the answer won't come through.
	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster?
	That's a question I would like an answer to.
		A little piece of cheese annoys 
		A mouse, there is no doubt,
		But here's the one thing I've been trying 
		Hard to figure out:
	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster
	When an oyster's in a stew?

	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster?
	I asked them at the zoo, they said they wished they knew.
	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster?
	That's a question I would like an answer to.
		A piece of cheese annoys a mouse,
		The mouse annoys in turn
		The cat who then annoys the dog,
		But still I cannot learn:
	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster
	When an oyster's in a stew?

Oysters live a life within a very narrow scope
One thing I've found out is that an oyster don't like soap
I'll admit the problem's been a sticker from the go
I've asked most everyone I've met, and no one seems to know

	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster?
	I've figured till I'm blue, so now I'm asking you.
	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster?
	That's a question I would like an answer to.
		A piece of cheese annoys the mouse,
		The mouse annoys the cat,
		The cat annoys the dog, the dog 
		Annoys your Sunday hat!
	But, What kind of a noise annoys an oyster
	When an oyster's in a stew?

	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster?
	I've asked each one I knew, from here to Kalamazoo.
	What kind of a noise annoys an oyster?
	That's a question I would like an answer to.
		Now, simple things annoy a lot of 
		Simple folks, you see,
		And that's most likely why this question 
		Is annoying me!
	But, What kind of a noise annoys an oyster
	When an oyster's in a stew?, da-doodle-ooh-doo!

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